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Promenading on the Fine Line

Thursday, May 11, 2017 @ 2:02 AM
With a warm embrace,

I spotted you in the middle of a large crowd, but it wasn't too difficult for our eyes to meet as the area was slowly emptying while the day grew darker. I caught your attention and excitedly ran up to hug you. There was such a livid tenderness in our encounter--you never fail to brighten my day as I feel your genuine concern about my well being.

How are you? How have you been? Are you doing okay? You kindly asked in so many ways, yet I didn't know what to say, or where to start.

Out of sheer excitement, all I could reply with was I'm doing okay, but I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm good. Just got out of class and now I'm here, I'm good, just a little bit tired. But enough about me, tell me what you're up to.

Small talk and future plans became a little more concrete, but each time you asked how I was really doing, all I wanted to blurt out was, I feel exhausted, and I feel so terrible, and I am deprived of sleep and can barely stay awake--I don't know why I'm here exactly. I'm having a bout of emotions revolving around the clouds of mistrust and hints of betrayal and negligence once more. Perhaps jealously and incompetence are the driving forces of this negativity. I am worried and endlessly stressed about my future. I'm not okay, and I am drained physically, mentally, and spiritually. I almost nodded off on the drive back--I'm not in good shape, nor am I in a good spot right now. But as soon as I felt your presence, a tiny sapling sprouted from its soil within me; perhaps by chance, that is why I'm here.

But no, I'm doing good, was all I could repeatedly tell you. My eyes were evidently very heavy and lost its lustre and my hair disheveled and unkempt. I could tell you didn't buy it, but you willingly played along. I didn't want to dampen the glowing aura radiating from you. I wanted to bask and absorb as much as I could in our brief yet sweet encounter.

Until next time,
I'll tell you everything.